Scary Baby Scared The Parents.

We had our 16-week checkup yesterday!  As an added value bonus, I also got my H1N1 vaccine.  After having the 'flu with Savannah, I am not taking that risk again - and this one seems to be really nasty for people with immunocompromised systems... like say, pregnant women.  And possibly women who get sick easily even without being pregnant.  And former smokers.  And... I digress.  A poke in the arm for a 'flu vaccine never killed me before, and going without it one year potentially could have killed Savannah... so I'm taking no chances.

And as you can surmise, I'm still alive.

But on to Scary Baby!

I decided not to know what my weight gain is but the really good news is that my blood pressure seems to have come back to "normal" - I was 118/70 which makes me much happier.  After about 20 minutes (longest we've ever had to wait here), we met our first lady doc, Dr. Gould.  Really nice and very helpful.  Since she didn't ask me about gestational diabetes or talk to me about weight gain I assume I'm progressing nicely.   We talked about why my heart and head are pounding and why I have constant headaches, and the reason is... "You're pregnant!"  She told me how to get around nosy pharmacists who don't want to give pregnant women decongestants (yes, this happened to me)... send Ivan to get them for me!  I now have a game plan.

She then skipped straight to the fact that we have not set up an amniocentesis date. At first I was kinda annoyed about this.  Two out of three appointments have seemed to focus on why Ivan and I aren't scheduling an as-yet unneeded amniocentesis.  The philosophy behind doing so seems to be, "Well, what if you need to make a Decision?"

We already have!  We have decided to await the results of our integrated screening.  A quick explanation....

There are a couple different ways a couple can pursue genetic screening.  There's the fast but least accurate way, which would have given us early results (we'd have known by now what our odds are of having a baby with a genetic defect) but with an extremely high rate of false positives.  There's the not-as-fast quad screening, which also has a (slightly lower) unacceptable rate of false positives.  Both these tests consist of the nuchal fold ultrasound measurement and a single blood test in the first trimester.  They're done mostly so that parents can decide whether to go ahead and schedule an amnio right away.

We opted for the slowest but surest method, which involves the nuchal fold measurement, two blood tests, and a high-resolution (level II) ultrasound.  We won't find out til all of the work is done and the results are processed and combined to give us our odds of having a child with genetic defects, but we will have 90-95% accuracy.

The big reason for getting an amniocentesis done is so we could make another decision if need be - whether or not to have a therapeutic abortion.  Couples make this choice based on chromosomal anomalies routinely, and the earlier in pregnancy it's done, the better.  We have some pretty definite ideas of what we would need to see on the high-res ultrasound to convince us that we need this.  We would need to see a baby that is clearly incompatible with life and for whom dragging it down the birth canal only to put it through excruciating pain for the three or four hours it lives would be intolerable agony.  We couldn't do that to our child.

An amniocentesis would reveal anomalies that might require medical intervention at birth - but so will a high resolution ultrasound.  Since there still is a small risk that amniocentesis can cause a miscarriage, we want to avoid it if at all possible.  If the high resolution ultrasound reveals minor issues that are still compatible with life, we'll have the amniocentesis done to see what we're facing down the road.  Otherwise, we prefer not to take the risk.

The concern our doctors (who really do seem concerned) have is that most states will not perform therapeutic abortions beyond the 22-24 week mark.  Well, we're wrapping up the bloodwork and ultrasounds at the 19 week mark, and I've been assured we should have results back within the following week.  So if, and obviously we want this to be a big IF, we need to make that decision, we'll have the time to do it.

I always hate talking and typing about this stuff.  Makes me teary and what not.  But we were able to convey this to Dr. Gould and she was right on board.

So, after this big long discussion about why we are not all fired up to get amniocentesis scheduled before the results of our integrated screening, we moved on to the heartbeat time, yay!  I hopped up on the table and bared my belly.

No yay.  No heartbeat.  Dr. Gould was chatting to us while she looked and I was chatting back gamely, and it still wasn't there.  She reassured me that it was still pretty challenging to find the heartbeat with the Doppler instrument this early, and decided to go find out if the room with the ultrasound machine was available.

She left.  I hopped off the table and dived at Ivan.  I didn't cry.  I felt like I was holding together pretty well and I know, know, KNOW that babies can be difficult this early.  Ivan and I made small talk about nothing I can remember and I compulsively rubbed his fuzzy head.

Four years, three months, and two days later she came back and took us to the ultrasound room.

And there was Scary Baby!  In all his lazy, non-moving glory.  For a moment I panicked because I didn't see the heart flicker that we saw the last three times, but he IS getting skin and fat deposits and stuff, so it stands to reason.  After moving the instrument around a little bit, Dr. Gould was able to find the heart beat at 144 bpm.  Scary Baby is sitting up pretty high, which makes it understandable that he was hard to find on the Doppler.

Dr. Gould told us about a time she was using a Doppler and couldn't hear anything on it... no placental noise, nothing.  She looked at the battery indicator and said, "Oh, it died..." and you can imagine the mother's reaction...  she said she had to backpedal reeeeally fast and explain that she was talking about the machine... not the baby...

I think I still would prefer that to Scary Baby, who is sleeping comfortably and has drained me with all the excitement he caused.  Nap time, and then I have a gorgeous grapefruit awaiting my afternoon graze.  He seems to like those.  I'm hoping enough vitamin C will help my sinuses get ungermy and thus, the headache I've had for two weeks will go away.

Here's to hope!

Pregnant Brain!

I can't believe I forgot to make this blog entry.  I actually thought I had, and was a bit bummed that I didn't really feel like I had anything to write.  Then Ivan told me I hadn't made it... Doh!

So, we had our nuchal translucency screening on Friday the 9th October.  And this is what we saw...

Yes, a sleeping baby.  Kiddo was not interested in being awake at 8:30 A.M.  The head and arm (curled kinda under the head) are to the left and the rump is to the right; child is faced away from the nasty ultrasound waves.

After much jiggling of my belly and having me turn on my side, we got this:

Which the ultrasound tech labeled, "Hi guys!!!"  But Ivan and I know it really was more of a, "Mmmph... go 'way, I'm sleeping!" type wave.

Finally, kiddo cooperated and gave us this:

And we were able to take the necessary measurements.  We measured a 1.5mm fold, which was well within normal range (anything under 2mm is considered normal).  Kiddo was also 7.5 cm long (3 inches) and had a heart rate of 154.

We'll be going back to our regular clinic for our monthly checkup on the 27th October (at 16 weeks) and then!  We'll have our wicked cool Level II ultrasound... on Ivan's birthday!  We'll be 19 and a half weeks.  In addition to cool measurements and possible gender identification, I'll be finishing up the integrated screening with another donation of my precious blood.  About a week or two after that, we'll get back the results, and have an idea if any genetic abnormalities will be popping up.

Since the tendency with the NT scan is toward false positives - meaning the fold measures abnormally high - I'm already feeling pretty good about our odds.

I'm over the queasiness!  And I'm starting to get some energy back.  Still having shortness of breath, and my blood pressure is still going up - well, the systolic is, at 124 (it was 110 two weeks before getting pregnant); the diastolic is going back to my normal of 65-68.  But I'm not as lightheaded.  I just feel my heartbeat racing all the time.  Very disconcerting.

I am also having problems sitting for long periods of time; my sciatica is flaring up when I do, and my hips and knees ache like mad.  We went to see "Where the Wild Things Are" last night (loved it), and for the last half hour, I was in agony.  By the time we got home, my entire lower body ached.  I slept with a pillow between my knees and just focused on relaxing.  When I woke, my pain was gone.  So apparently, the hormones that cause your cartilage to soften are working just fine, and I just need to listen to my body... no sitting still for long periods of time.

Otherwise, things are good.  Recent bizarre cravings have been: corned beef hash and eggs (seriously, who eats that anymore... besides me); taco shells (no filling, just the shell); and more mustard.  Mustard?  Can that much mustard possibly be healthy for me?

Will post again... sooner!

Remiss! Appointment, Mustard, and More

First, the more:

Ivan unsquished the baby!  This is a picture from our NT ultrasound done on the 25th September.  The baby was aged 11 weeks, 3 days, and was too small to have the screening for Down Syndrome done.  So we'll be going back on the 9th October for that.  All that really means to us is more free pictures!

Now, the appointment -- I did have a 12-week checkup on 29 September.  All my labs were fine and I haven't gained any weight (which means I've lost some "bad" weight because I know I've gained some "good" weight, hurrah!).  We were able to hear the heartbeat on the Doppler (remember those stethoscopes with the cone attached to them?  So much more sophisticated now) and the doctor said all is well.  He did say we have a 1 in 40 chance of having a child with birth defects, but Ivan and I have adopted a largely fatalistic attitude about that--if we do, we do, and there's really nothing we can do to change that right now, so why worry about it?  We enjoyed our talk with Dr. Grillo, the second of 5 pediatricians who comprise our birth team.  We'll meet the lady docs later, starting at the end of this month.  Dr. Grillo was very enthusiastic about cord blood banking and its recent advances in application--which, if we truly do have an infant with congenital heart defects or other correctible issues, could be a lifesaver.  Something for us to consider.

On to the mustard!  I finally have had a "weird" craving.  Yes, it's mustard.  I confessed to Ivan the other night that I had to fight an urge to squeeze a healthy (or unhealthy) dollop directly from container into mouth.  I did buy some frozen soft pretzels to cover with the stuff so I felt better (and prevented a stomach ache; have you ever eaten a teaspoon of mustard straight?  Yick.) about my weirdness.  Other than that, I've had what I think of as "food urges" which don't really count as cravings, because they're not outre, they're just stuff I'd like to eat.  Things like fried chicken, or chili, or Chinese food--stuff I would normally want but don't indulge in too often because they're not terribly good for me.

And unfortunately, my queasiness is back.  And did I mention the fatigue?  My blood pressure was a bit higher than normal at my last appointment (although still in the normal range) although no one seems to be worried about it, as a combination of hormones and increased blood volume apparently will do that.  But that and the constant tiredness keeps me from feeling quite the thing, particularly after any exertion, mild or otherwise.  Very frustrating.  My newest trick is getting up in the middle of the night to pee and being too nauseous to get back to sleep but too tired to get up.  Marvelous, I must say.

I am trying to commit to more naps, although I feel guilty when I take them, and more small meals, to include salad and other fresh greens.  I think both will help me feel a bit more like myself.

Other than that, I am loving tummy time--Ivan and I will snuggle of an evening with his hand on my expanding uterus, just rubbing gently, the both of us basking in the awe and wonder of what we have done.  It is good.