36 Weeks, Walkies, and Ivan is Nesting.

Week 35 seemed to fly by for some reason, and I think it's because my appointments are now on Fridays - not on my "traditional" date of  Tuesday, which is when I officially mark another week off on the calendar.  Since appointment day is when I normally do the blog updates, I kinda decided to just wait the four days and do my update today, on the first day of Week 36.

The last appointment was fine - I'm measuring on track, I've actually lost a pound (which I can afford to do), and aside from the usual anemia, my labs are all looking good.  Dr. Haberstroh reassured me that my team is in no hurry; I won't be induced until 42 weeks unless it's obvious that the kiddo is ready and is just stuck.  That eased my mind - I don't want to rush Ivan Jr out of his home, and lots of the women on my pregnancy forum are already talking about their induction dates.  I'm okay with waiting however long our son needs to have mature lungs and eyes, and knowing that my medical team feels the same way is a relief.  I have been so happy with my care here.

So today is Week 36, and I'm not sure I'm ready, either logistically or emotionally.  It's hard to imagine I could be only 2 weeks away from a full-term and healthy delivery.  While we have most of the essentials needed, we still have painting to do in the nursery and the crib to set up.  And furniture to move around.  And... yeah.  Stuff to do.

And yes!  The crib!  I'm so happy about this - the Alexanders and Prescotts got together and bought us the crib, the mattress, mattress pad, and crib sheets... and I can't wait to set it up in the baby's room:

 

From Amazon -
"The Dakota classic crib is the first Graco baby furniture to be eco friendly.  It is certified by the Forest Stewardship Council (FSC). All wooden components are sustainable woods from responsibly managed forests and are certified to the standards of the FSC by the Rainforest Alliance Smart Wood Program. All finishes are water based and packaging is from recycled or recyclable materials."

It means a lot to us to have this particular crib, and because it's a convertible, our kiddo will be sleeping on it for a long time - which means it's also great to have the Sealy mattress we wanted.  Thank you guys so, so much.

We also received a $50 gift certificate for our registry on Amazon from my parents, which I've used to buy the aforementioned Snoogle (still one of the best purchases I've made) and another diaper cover for my stash - very important and useful, thank you so much.

We also have received a practically new playard from our friends Will and Jessie Carlson - a nicer Graco than the one I'd had on our registry!  So awesome to have something I can use in the living room while vacuuming, folding laundry, etc.  I'm not gonna lie, those stairs are kicking my butt right now, and any trip I don't have to make up or down is a good thing to me, particularly with a baby in my arms.  The playard has a bassinet and changing attachment, with a place to keep diapers and wipes.  How cool is that???  I know, it'd be even cooler if I'd thought to take a picture before I made a post, except my camera battery is currently dead.  Next time, I promise.

In other news, Kate called me yesterday with a need to let out some stress, so we took the dogs to the park.  She had Roger run our favorite bike/skate/walking path with her while Kinsey and I followed a bit more sedately.  Yes, I can still do a 1.15 mile circuit, albeit slowly.  Felt pretty empowering.  My legs feel fine today, although my pelvis is on fire - that just tells me I need to do this more often.  Kate has promised to take her mother for walkies at least once a week from here on out.

So we're getting there.  I should mention that I also visited our storage center one rainy day last week and retrieved the cradle that has been passed down by the Beckwiths:



Which will be residing in our bedroom for the first couple of months.   Ivan was going to move it in last night, but I had things piled in it.  He was crestfallen.  It's alright - I have other furniture for him to move first.  And he is in the process of matching bedding swatches to paint chips so we can get the nursery done.  Lots to do, and where did the last nine months go?  How did we get to the end with a frantic need to finish projects we knew needed doing?

But in a way, I like this - it's keeping me busy here and now when it would be too easy to dwell and become impatient and have these last few weeks go soooo slowly.  And we really have done things... getting the van fixed and the carpet cleaner fixed (which isn't; I tried to use it yesterday and it needs to go back to the shop).  Ivan's spent a couple Saturdays with his Habitat for Humanity homebuilding project, and I'm so proud of him for his involvement.  And he's had schoolwork and is really conscientious about his studying.  And still he's managed to get the walls repaired from Savannah's angsty teenage years, and sanded, and taped.  I've decided to let him do his thing with paint;  this way he doesn't contemplate smothering the mother of his child, and I don't hate all his color choices for being too dark.  We managed to compromise when we did the living room, and I love the results, but I've decided it's time for me to let go and just trust his very discerning eye.

It's so neat to watch him gearing up for the arrival of our child.  And to see him looking at my belly in awe and with pride.  And to go through classes and share Ivan Jr's movement and the little things I don't really care for, like only being able to sleep on my right side unless I want to be pummeled by unhappy baby.  And the things I do care for, like... our son loves music.  Vivaldi and Aerosmith.  Music from Opa Peter and from the Beatles.  And he appears to prefer mint chocolate chip ice cream to all others.  I for one am a fan of Rocky Road, but I can eat the green stuff if it keeps him happy.

Life is good.

34 Weeks, and A Plea

Dear Best Husband In The World™:

You have so many admirable qualities.  You never leave dirty socks lying around.  You are so good about emptying your lunch box for me when you come  home.  You carry the vacuum cleaner up and down the stairs for me.  And not only do you put the toilet seat down, you put the lid down too.  This is a great deterrent to the large animals (by which I refer to the dogs and not the children) with whom you reside on my behalf (with great tolerance and fortitude) when they'd prefer to view the toilet as a drinking fountain, and also keeps our chi from flowing out of the house and into the septic tank, where it isn't likely to do us much good.

Sadly, this is a habit that is not as helpful at this point in our lives as it will be again, I hope, in other times... such as when we have an enterprising toddler who might see the toilet as a mini-tub in which to play with his bath toys.

For now, however, as you so cheerfully pointed out in class, my bladder is being used as a trampoline by Child Within.  This is uncomfortable at the best of times, but at the worst of times - which I have begun to consider the hours between 2 AM and 6 AM - this is enough to wake me from a sound sleep with a sense of urgency that propels me to the bathroom.

So far, so good - that is indeed the direction in which I want (and need) to go.  But in my semi-somnolent state, my body is far more awake than my brain, and when I get to the bathroom, all it wants is to relieve the pressure as quickly as possible.  Nothing in the brain is working more efficiently than that urge - including the signal that was supposedly sent to my eyes to tell them to open.  And so I stumble blind into our tiny water closet.

The first time I encountered the lid in its down position, it was a cold, entirely unwelcome shock against my bare and warm-from-the-bed nether parts.  It nearly negated the need for me to lift the lid, but would have created a really big mess.  Fortunately, I had the presence of mind to cross my legs before standing back up and then bending down again to lift.

This does not seem like such a big deal - remember to lift before sitting - but as you know, we live in a house that was designed for Little People.  Okay, I exaggerate - but again as you well know, the original owners were both around 5 feet tall and you and I are not.

Now picture your largely pregnant wife trying to squat sideways to lift that lid (because our water closet dimensions were again, not designed for women closer to 6 feet tall than 5 feet tall, and thus, both my largely pregnant stomach and my almost-as-pregnant ass do not fit well in that space unless turned sideways) while trying desperately to control the urge to relieve my poor abused bladder as it waits for squat, lift, squat, position, and release.  In, please all that is holy and benevolent, that order.

The good thing about my increased posterior dimension is that the one time I had the presence of mind to anticipate the lid being down (it wasn't) and lifted it (in the dark with my eyes closed), and discovered (belatedly) that I'd actually lifted the seat instead... I did not fall in.  And I awoke almost instantly which, if we are trying to be positive, is in some cases good (but not in this one).

So, this letter is designed to be both informative - why the toilet lid does not seem to stay down - and importunate - please understand that I'm not doing this out of laziness, but to save my poor aching knees and overworked bladder - and I hope you will, with your typical aplomb and patience, accept this as just another pregnancy foible that will one day come to an end.

I love you.

33 Weeks, And My OB Thinks I Am Funny.

My OB appt today:
Me:  "I can't squat or bend over without getting dizzy and faint."
OB:  "So don't squat or bend over.  Find someone to do it for you."
Me:  "But I want to exercise!"
OB:  "So do it without squatting or bending over."
Me:  "But what about not being able to sleep unless I'm propped up?  With my heart racing and bile coming up and what not..."
OB:  "In another month, you'll be able to sleep however you want."
Me:  "But... *whine*"
OB:  "You're pregnant, and you're 40.  Welcome to the harsh reality of both.  All done?"
Me:  "No magic pill?"
OB:  "*laughing*  See you in two weeks."

My blood pressure was back down to 114/70, which is awesome because it's very close to my starting BP, and nowhere near last week's record high of 146/84.  My anemia is under control (yay!) and even though I'm gaining weight a lot faster than I want to, the OB I saw today didn't seem to think it was too rapid (2 pounds in a week sounds like a LOT, though... when I gained 18 pounds the entire first 30 weeks... but I guess it's better than the 5 pounds I gained in the two weeks between 30 and 32.  Not by much.).  So I'm mollified, but not content - I want my body to do stuff and it doesn't want to cooperate.

But the kiddo is fine - head down (feet usually under ribs) and heartbeat is strong and steady.  So we keep baking.

32 Weeks, Anxiety, and My New Bed Partner.

It's kinda crazy to realize that we're as little as 6 weeks and as many as 8 weeks away from a healthy, full-term birth.  I can't decide if I feel like I've been pregnant for a long time or a fleeting moment - the pregnancy hasn't really weighed on me and I'm not champing at the bit to evict the kiddo, although I won't mind being done.

For the most part, I miss my energy and cognitive clarity.  Due to lack of sleep, sinuses that are even more overworked than usual, and my aggravated arthritis and sciatica, I feel like I'm walking around in a mental fog and not getting a whole lot done.

This isn't exactly true; I'm just not walking a mile every morning with the dogs and tackling big house projects.  My online presence and gaming time have disappeared.  I'm keeping up with the laundry, dusting, vacuuming, dishes, shopping, cooking, etc.  I'm amassing what I am referring to as our "baby stash-" diapers, clothes, blankies, etc.  So things are getting done.

But... I can't walk up my stairs without getting winded.  I'm sleeping sitting up because when I lie down, my heart starts racing.  And I finally had to take off my wedding ring.  I know!  I was upset, too.  As for the sleeping thing, I recently broke down and bought a Snoogle:

Yes, it's as big as it looks.  But it's filled to the perfect dimension for supporting a preggo.  Usually I roll it up like this:

And I sleep sort of snuggled into the hole in the Snoogle.  Sounds like a Dr. Seussism.

Thursday was the 32-week appointment, wherein I have the highest blood pressure ever in my life and our newest OB (Dr. Faulkner, we both loved her on sight) reassures me that I am not dying of some esoteric disease simply because of my racing heart and high BP.  Baby Ivan is measuring right on track for an April 13th arrival, and I'm doing fine other than experiencing high blood volume (normal in a pregnant woman) and reacting to same.  She did suggest I might be suffering from anxiety, and she's probably got a more objective viewpoint than I do, so I'm going to try to work on relaxation techniques and soothing thoughts.  I am now reveling in the phrase, "You are damaging my calm."  Ah, Firefly... and my hero, Jayne Cobb.

Because of my less-than-ideal blood pressure, I have an appointment next week to follow up.  Oh!  And I found out that the baby's head is often resting right above my pelvic bones, which explains the resultant pain any time I change positions or try to walk.  But... he is in good position for birthing, so that's a relief. 

We may also get a "positioning" ultrasound at full term, so we can see just what Kiddo is up to - so yay for that!

In other news, I haven't thrown up at all this month.  I realize this may be more information than anyone wanted about my pregnancy, but it was an alarming trend there, for a while.  So that's a plus. 

Stay tuned.

Thirty-One.

It seems unreal... we're in single digits no matter how you slice it, 38 weeks or 40. 

I can't decide if it took forever or if time is flying by.  I will say that there's a lot to get done in the next 8-9 weeks.  There's a portable crib in storage that needs to be retrieved and spruced up.  There are more diapers to buy and prep for use.  And there's cleaning to be done.

I'm pretty resigned to the fact that there are things we need to do before we can go crazy on the baby buying (swing, pack & play,etc) - we have a vehicle to repair, a tree to remove, and a mouse to evict.  Mr. Mouse is extremely stubborn and avoiding all the traps we've laid, humane and otherwise, so it looks like we're going to need a pro to do the trick.  So I'm focusing on the basics and the rest we'll get when we can.

Because that's what I needed right now, yes?  But that's not really why I'm a bit stressed.

Scary Baby scared me again.

Just when I thought I was used to his shenanigans and insistence on peculiar little things like me sleeping ONLY on my right side... he woke me up by kicking the crap out of me.  I mean, seriously.  It was so hard that it WOKE.  ME.  UP.  And it was really frantic and frenetic.  And then, all of a sudden, it stopped.

Just like that.

And in my semi-conscious state, all I could think was, "Oh, shit... he just strangled himself with his cord."

Seriously - I wasn't calm, I wasn't entertaining any other possibilities, I wasn't capable of doing anything but lying there, numb and prepared to be shattered.  I have no idea why I fixated on that as the answer (probably Ivan's baby story?) but I was convinced that was it.

And I waited and waited and waited, tears spilling over, whole body tight so I wouldn't wake Ivan up by crying.

And finally he moved again, tentatively at first, but then with strength and enthusiasm. 

He's grounded as soon as he's old enough to understand why.

Honestly, I've been pretty mellow throughout the different scary scenarios we've had - waiting for test results, falling down the steps, spotting early on, dealing with my shortness of breath and dizziness.  But this tore my composure, my strength, my assurance.  I am now terrified that I won't get to meet him until it's too late. 

And most of the time, I can cope and put on my happy face and fake it, because I know that doing this will help me get through the day while I do my kick counts and watch my diet to make sure I'm getting enough iron and all the other little things I can control.

But I hate going to bed now, and not just because it's the most painful part of my day (stupid hips and stupid sciatica). Now when I wake up, even if it's just to pee, I can't relax until he moves.

So I really can't decide if it's taking forever, or flying by.  Either way, I'll be glad when I can actually see what the little monster is up to without the use of an ultrasound.

Sinus Headaches, I Hates Them.

I was going to write an update yesterday detailing the wonderful checkup and hospital tour we had on Thursday, but the weather thought otherwise - we had a pressure front come through (yes, I know this is not really news considering half the East Coast is under snow and the rest of us are concerned about flooding) and it played havoc with my sinuses.  I spent most of the day on the couch with hot compresses on my forehead, wishing I could pound my head against the wall to make it feel better... but I didn't have the energy.

Today I'm feeling lots better, though!  And for the most part, I'm feeling pretty good otherwise - meaning, pregnancy-wise.  I'm tired a lot but I don't have any swelling; I get some pelvic pain but my back feels pretty good mostly.  I've been very careful with my posture so that really helps.  The only thing that really makes me miserable is the acid reflux, and that's more a matter of getting the timing down with the Pepcid AC, and learning to eat smaller meals more often (and not so late at night).  I'm not waddling yet!

On Thursday, we met our 4th of five OBs that comprise our practice, and she is just as great as the others.  She told me my glucose test results were great, but that my anemia is back - a good excuse for more steak, I say.  We're measuring right on track and his heart beat is strong and steady.

We also had our hospital tour that night!  It was a lot of fun. Ivan bonded with another dad when the guy admired his "geek" T-shirt... said he had the same one.  Later, when the nurse mentioned that every labor room is equipped with Wi-fi and that an enterprising dad had actually hooked up a Wii, their eyes met in conspiratorial fashion. 

I'm pretty happy with the facility; there's a NICU, they have privileges at Scottish Rite and Eggleston (our two top children's hospitals in Atlanta), and there are antepartum rooms if your baby has to stay longer than you do.  The birthing beds configure every which way you could possibly want, so I don't have to worry about trying to give birth flat on my back.  The mother-baby rooms are all singles, so no rooming in with other moms, and there's a couch for dad (even though it looks incredibly uncomfortable).  They support nursing immediately after birth, and dads are always encouraged to go with their baby when he needs to head to the nursery for cleaning, vitamin K, and the hep B vaccine.  The tour guide nurse clued the dads in to the wealth of delivery menus at the nurses' station and let us know that coolers were allowed in the rooms.  Score!  No boring hospital food for us!  Or... if I go on a last minute shopping spree, and we do get hungry, my meals are free, and his are $3, so at least we'll be able to afford to eat.

Not that I'll do that...

Our hospital uses baby alarms - also called, by the irreverent, Baby Lo-Jack, which is a security device that will sound an alarm when a baby gets within 3 feet of the elevator.  If the baby continues toward the exits, everything locks down - and they mean everything.  Nurses' badges do not work; the police are the only people able to move about freely.

Ivan had the idea of walking just close enough to the elevators to get Ivan Jr's alarm to beep, and then racing over to the nurses' station and saying, "My baby's beeping, I think his batteries are getting low..."

Yeah, I think it's going to be a long 24-48 hours for our nurses.

No News is Good News?

I was waiting to see if I was going to get results back from the gestational diabetes test before posting - and so far, nothing.  They were supposedly going to call me last Thursday or Friday if I was positive.  So that's a good thing!

30-week check-up tomorrow, AND our hospital tour, which is pretty exciting.  I'll post an update when we get back.